I Feel Like Stewie Griffin Today

You know, the sadistic little brat from "Family Guy". "Victory is mine" indeed so I'm gonna pile it on. The only thing that mars this day from total perfection is that I had to take the day off from work and thus, I couldn't rub it in my boss' face.

Blown out in Game 1, bugged out in Game 2, pulled out Game 3, and crapped out in Game 4. That sums up the Yankees vaunted forty-leventh consecutive trip to the offseason. Tell me, does that console the fanbase in the face of a third consecutive first round KO - all since the Greatest-Choke-of-All-Time in 2004?

I tried to imagine what happened in the owner's box after the third out last night but got so scared I needed to sleep with a teddy bear.

A few words for A-Rod: If the option is yours, STICK WITH THE YANKEES! Nobody is gonna want to pay through the nose for someone who tears through the regular season and then becomes this in the playoffs, unless it's one of those teams who like to put fannies in the seats but couldn't care less about the postseason. If it was just one playoffs, I'd be first in line with the "Sign A-Rod" chants but this is 3 years in a row that he has freakin disappeared once the regular season ended.

Two words for Theo Epstein: SEE ABOVE! A-Rod is not a reclamation project a la David Ortiz. A change of laundry is not going to overcome whatever causes his playoff paralysis. Theo, you have a third baseman in the fold who is top-tier defensively and upper-middle tier offensively. Certainly, he's been a bargain in the fifth spot (at about $5 million cheaper per year than J.D. Drew). His name is Mike Lowell. Please please please sign him.

edited to add these haikus i posted in The Joy of Sox:

Unlucky thirteen
A-Rod nine for sixty-one
Invisible Man
****
There once was a man named Torre
Who again in October says "Sorry"
"We just couldn't do it"
So George says "Just screw it"
and throws Joe under a lorry